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the right words...

me//emily freeman(speaker)//blair
All week I've been wanting to sit and do a proper recap from my time spent at The Influence Conference. I wanted to highlight all of the amazing sessions I attended and talk about all the beautiful and ugly tears that were shed throughout the conference. I wanted to share about my precious roommates and how I barely knew them going into it and came out holding a piece of each of them in my heart forevermore. I wanted to share how God touched my heart, spoke to my heart and tugged on my heart. I wanted so tell you how amazing it felt to be with 200+ other women who had the same interests. Blogging + Jesus. I wanted to post a million pictures and tag every sweet face I got to hug and meet in real life, but then I realized there was just too much. It was all just too much. Too much goodness that is.
I have been reading recap after recap from other bloggers and have laughed with some and teared up at others, because I was there and I experienced it and I understand. I felt what they felt and was blessed just like them. I went in without any expectations and yet was still blown away by how Big and Awesome it really was. Yet for some reason I still can't find the words. 
I started getting stressed thinking about how I didn't want to wait too long before I post about it because then it would just be weird when I finally digest everything and then have a post written in January about an event that took place in October. Lame.
Then that is when it hit me. I haven't digested or processed everything because there was so much God wanted me to hear. So I don't really need to write a post for everyone else right now.
That sounds rude when I re-read it, but I'm in no way intending it to be, I am just trying to dwell on the things I took away and I still need to let them sit. I need to be quiet and apply what I learned into my life and then when I filter through all of it share what needs to be shared.
does that make sense? okay it doesn't to me either but I can understand my own crazy talk.
Then I kind of went off on my own tangent as I went even deeper into my thoughts and heart and realized something more.
There really was so much I took away that has already impacted my life and I know it wouldn't matter if I eventually did find the right words to express it all because I might not need to share it. God met me there on a very real and personal level. I want to keep those things close to my heart. I know that I don't have to post about it because I have a feeling it will just be a natural overflow into this space of mine online and in my everyday life.

Then when I finally accepted that I may not have a "proper" recap I received an email from a fellow blogger who attended and in part of her email about the conference she wrote exactly what I was feeling, it read:
"I feel like so many of us don't know what to say about the conference or how to say it. I probably will never do a "recap" blog post but everything I learned and was blessed with will come out in my writing. I think it was such a personal experience for everyone."
That conference was real. Those women's hearts were real. Those messages spoken and lessons taught were real. The raw emotions splattered all over conference were real. The interactions and fellowship was real. 
I needed that reminder that our Influence, my Influence is real. Our God is real and has given each of us a purpose. A purpose to to show up and be ourselves and in the process glorify Him.
My heart is still so, so full and I'm grateful to have had the opportunity to take part in something so amazing!
And don't worry, I will still be quoting all the speakers in posts to come and will probably have random posts of pictures of faces I miss so much. 
Annnnnd I will most likely recap on some of my fave roommate moments and talk about what God really tugged on my heart about, or maybe I won't. No pressure.
Just know that the conference was amazing and if I never go to another blogging conference again I would be okay with it because I'm not sure anything could ever top that. With that being said, I'm totes going next year and hope all of you would consider going as well. Blogger or not, this was some powerful stuff that we all could learn and grow from.
If you really want to get some insight about the conference  and all its goodness you can check out this post from Jessie HERE and while you're there check out all the other links who linked up as well.

oh and I did post some pictures and tid-bits from the conference here, here and here
Happy Friday all!


~ko said...

I am making sure I will be there next year! What a wonderful time had by all! And you my dear always look so crazy cute! Happy Friday to you :)

Anonymous said...

:) Have a wonderful weekend sweetie! XOXO

Cassie @ Live.Laugh.L0ve. said...

I've learned that the right words often come to us when we least expect it. Even though you feel like you can't find them, I think they showed pretty well in this post. I am so happy to hear that you had a wonderful time at influence and God moved you in such amazing ways. Love you friend! xoxo

Anonymous said...

I had the hardest time putting into my own words the things God was speaking to me about so I just made a list of quotes I loved. How lame am I? But I just COULDN'T. It was all too wonderfully MUCH.

So glad I got to meet you wonderful self in person. XOXO. You're beautiful!

Summer said...

I am so bummed to have missed experiencing this with you all. I totally get what you are saying and can't wait to see how last weekend will impact you and your blog. Hugs!

collettakay said...

You're right. Sometimes it is more important to process something with our heart than with words. So glad you had a great time!

Here's what's new with me this week:


Kacia said...

I just love your stinking beautiful self.

thank you for all your hugs and smiles.


Therese said...

Don't feel bad about saying that you don't really need to write a post for everyone else right now. I totally resonate with you saying, "I am just trying to dwell on the things I took away and I still need to let them sit. I need to be quiet and apply what I learned into my life and then when I filter through all of it share what needs to be shared." Love it. Can't wait to see what comes out when things have settled!

Anonymous said...

Sounds like you had a wonderful time :)

Lotus Blossom Design said...

Ok, take me with you next time!!!!! 2013...I'm ready no more babies!

Brittany TYD said...

I completely agree with all of this! It's hard to recap something that was so personal and amazing. I don't even know where to start.

It was absolutely lovely meeting you!

Angela Paris said...

these look super tasty!
love for you to link this up on my pumpkin patch blog hop!