Learning

I feel the Lord has been teaching me so many things these past few weeks months. As I've mentioned in previous posts I've been having a rough season, and as I'm going through it and still learning from it, I'm not 100% comfortable sharing about it, right now.

Not only am I learning new things about myself and figuring out who I am and who I want to be, I am also learning so many other things.

I'm learning that I am literally growing to love this man and all his silliness more and more everyday. I didn't think I could love him more than I already did, but through this season of life I realized I was wrong. He is so amazingly good to me. 

 I'm learning I'm kind of obsessed with ruffles. A bit too much.

 I'm learning that Vernon will never be allowed to leave home. He is a momma's boy through and through. And I can't get enough of his squishiness. 

I'm learning to except things. Embrace things. To trust God even more and worry less. 

Like take Elsie for example. My shy little Pearl. I have worried about so many of her tendencies... until now. 

She took almost two years to actually go into church day care and like it. (I was worried she never would) She is incredibly uncomfortable taking pictures, especially when pressured. She will probably most likely not look at you when first introduced and may take an hour to warm up to you if not longer. She doesn't like to be pressured or rushed for anything and will instantly break out in tears even if you're just encouraging her to throw a bean bag at an oversized Goliath at the church's halloween festival. This is who she is.

I don't have to get frustrated with her for not smiling and saying hi. For scowling in almost every picture during every professional photo shoot we've done. For crying instantly when I say "come on baby, let's go we have to hurry" because she gets frazzled on being rushed. I'm learning she is tender-hearted. Sensitive. Loving. Kind and obedient.

These other things will pass and if they don't it's who she is. Not only do I want her to embrace who she is but I need to do the same.
Because here I am at 29 years of age just learning for the first time to do that for myself.

It is amazing to me that while I'm learning who my children and myself are becoming God knew this whole time who and what we would become.

Jerimiah 1:5 "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart..."

He knows our thoughts, desires and every need.

Psalm 139

He makes everything work together for our good.

Romans 8:28 "And we know all things work together for the good to them that Love God, to them who are called according to his purpose." 

I'm learning to tuck these promises in my heart and to fall back on them when I feel uncertain about my life.

Through my bible study this week I learned that through the ups and downs the believer may go through we cannot always control our circumstance, but we can and must control our perspective and the way we handle what comes our way.
It is maintaining a steadfast focus on God feeding our minds on His word that brings about the inner change we need to rise to the occasion.

I'm learning that while waiting on God to come to our aid we must praise him.
And that praise allows a change of heart and a chance to grow.