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A coffee date

If you were to come over for coffee today, you would've picked a good day to visit. My mom popped over yesterday and ended up staying the night so my house has been picked up and cleaned. Though the house is tidy we would still probably head out into the sunroom where we'd be stepping over toys and avoiding the eye sore of my craft station as we sit and enjoy our drinks while the kids play. I would then share with you about some changes that have been happening in my heart.
I would've asked if you read this post and talked about how God has been pressing more and more on prioritizing my life for Him and how I should be seeking His kingdom first for everything. 
I would tell you that I have been going back and forth about participating in all the fall and holiday boutiques I have been asked to sign up for and how I was so stressed about it all up until a week ago.
I would be honest and tell you that I had to put my wants aside and truly seek God's will for my life.
I would let you know that if I was being completely honest I'm a little sad that I won't be participating in any of the boutiques this year but also how excited I was by the rush of relief that poured over me once I made that decision.
via pinterest
I would ask if you remembered the boutique I mentioned here, called The Sashes Market and how stoked I was to be a vendor at it because it was part of The Influence Conference I'm attending in October. I would tell you that though I was excited about it,   I totally stalled on paying the booth fee because something wasn't sitting right in my soul. 
That something was conviction but I was trying to pass off as guilt. You see guilt is of the enemy and is confusing whereas conviction is from the Lord and should motivate us in doing good and strive to make better decisions. By passing it off as guilt I was allowing myself to overlook it and fog my judgement. 
I would tell you that after sitting through yet another amazing Women's Study at my church that one of the speaker's words rang true to my heart about putting God First. Truly making Him priority and how secondly I need to be loving my family as He commands and how that would make decisions that come up in my life much simpler because those things that aren't truly bringing Glory to God are meaningless and are basically a waste of time.
I would tell you that it hurt my pride a bit because I feel like I'm constantly seeking God's will but realized as much as I was seeking His will I was also trying to fit my will in there too.
Then I would go back to talking about The Sashes Market and let you know that I eventually swallowed my pride and wrote the gals in charge an email stating that I would not be able to be part of it this year, and was honest with them about never actually praying about it and that I just jumped in assuming it was something I was supposed to take part in because let's be honest it is a Faith conference, where God is the focus, so of course this was something I was supposed to be part of, right??!! RIGHT!? Instead of praying about it and seeking what God wanted and not what I wanted I had to write an embarrassing email. 
Then I would tell you that the women were so understanding and even more so encouraged me in my decision and helped confirm that was what I was supposed to do. 
I would tell you that I cried about it. Yeah, I know, LAME, but I was sad. I wanted to be part of the Conference in a bigger way and being a vendor and not just another blogger attending seemed to be the perfect fit, or so I thought. 
I'm not gonna lie. The next day I received a slew of orders. I thought, wow I wouldn't have been able to embroider these because I was going to start prepping for the boutique and I felt that was God saying, 
"don't worry dear daughter, I got you. You can be creative and have this outlet and use these talents I blessed you with to make pretty things that are created to encourage others, but it can't be on a larger boutique scale right now because I have other priorities for you to take care of. You have these babies I need you to train up and a husband that needs your prayers, time and attention right now. Don't worry about being noticed and standing out in the crowd because of what you make, focus more on your heart and what you can do to make much of me and it will be so much better than any fame or fortune you can receive from those things"
Then I would take a sip of my coffee wipe away my tears and tell you that God is so, so good. And I love that HE loves us so, even when we make decisions that weren't based on His word or were based off of our own wants, He still chooses to bless us and I just can't seem to wrap my head around that.
I would ask you if you could make sense of that either, and we'd both laugh at how undeserving we are of HIS great love and start snacking on the homemade scones I prepared. 
Then before I ask you about what was going on in your life I would share something else I learned. 
About how all these wonderful opportunities have come up for me recently. Boutiques, Sole Hope Ambassador, ministry at church, different blog opportunities, and the list goes on... that through all these new opportunities I realized even though these things are all good things I want to take part in, it doesn't mean they are things God wants for me.
I'm learning that just because good things come up and are in effort to serve the Lord, they may not be what He wants me to be doing at this particular time. Because we are told to do serve with ALL of our heart. But I can't possibly do that when I'm filling my heart with all these distractions. How can I do all of these things well when I'm spread so thin? I'm learning that when I truly seek him and I'm receiving His blessings because of it, then these things that are important to me like being part of boutiques, blogging, ministry, Sole Hope... because all these things make me feel good, like I have something more to offer as a person that He revealed HE already sees me as someone who has more to offer and I don't need to try and prove that. He can fill me up and replace that needing to feel wanted with His love for me and the knowledge that He wants me. He desires me. He seeks after me and that is so refreshing. Putting life into a clearer perspective and making the decision to take a step back was so much easier to do. 

So now how about you? What changes have you needed to make in your life? 

And on a much lighter note I took Alissa's challenge to try and share about ourselves in 30 seconds via VLOG so enjoy!

coffeedate from Natalie on Vimeo.
Happy Friday Friends! Hope you have a very blessed weekend.
Linking up with this pretty lady for our coffee date!  


Lora said...

you're so cute! that vlog made me smile. and i totally understand what you shared too in your post. i have definitely been there, too! thanks for being so real and transparent. :) lora

beth @ the city said...

I loved your vlog and getting to know you better!
And I read your post too ;) and the one from yesterday and just realized I totally forgot/got distracted from commenting...oops! I really respect your decision with Influence/Sashes Market. I can't imagine how tough that was. I know what you mean about jumping in on things before you pray about it. I know awesome things are going to come of Influence and even though I cannot attend, I hope to learn something from others going :)
Happy Friday and I hope you have a great weekend!

monique said...

loved your vlog!

I just wanted to say thank for being so open and sharing your heart. your words have blessed me beyond belief. your words have encouraged me to not give up and reminded me that i am not alone.

p.s. i live in southern california too!

vintage grey said...

Beautiful and inspiring post Nat! Thanks for always sharing your heart and how God is working in your life! Wishing you a blessed weekend sweet friend! xo Heather

Ali said...

I loved reading this post. I totally admire you making the hard decision to put your desires down to serve your family and follow God's lead. You are so talented and make beautiful things. It's such an example to so many people to put God and your family first. Thanks for being so honest on here.

Ali said...

ps...i decided to join you in the challenge haha it was so weird to video record myself!

Angela said...

I love how transparently you write. Good for you for staying true to your heart. You are right...God is SO good!

TessBenson said...

Crusty eyelashes and homemade scones, your so cute. I loved your bloggidy post {{Wow Wow}} and your heart. Thanks for being real, its what us real people need and love to read, and hear!

~Damita's Pretty Wrap~ said...

What a lovely post, thanks for sharing with us, God is good :) Hope you have a blessed weekend sweet friend! :) ~Smiles xx Holly

Alissa Circle said...

I love you!! 30 seconds was seriously not long enough. I can't believe you don't like milk! I can't live without the stuff!!

Nay said...

your vlog was the bestest - love love love

Lotus Blossom Design said...

hahaha i adore you i was thinking there is no way Nat did this in 30secs LOL xoxo great video